In my mind it’s difficult to understand what’s real and what’s fake. My dreams are so vivid and alive that they feel real, but they’re not. And in my mind, what’s real is just a routine that I have to do on a daily basis. Like my dream about being a witch with magical powers like talking to the dead. Now that was a crazy dream, its not like I could fly or anything, it was just weird. I’ve also had a dream where I could control almost 100% of my brain, although a normal human can only control 10%. I felt pretty powerful about the whole idea. But I don’t feel real, I feel like a dream. My dreams and my reality are so mixed up together that It’s difficult for even me to realize what’s real and what’s not. If you don’t understand my mind, don’t feel alone. Neither do I.
My dreams are never true, but I wish they were. My reality is not the way I want it, but it never will be. I have written many times about dreams and reality. I’ve never really shared my stories though because they didn’t make sense to me. I wish I could find a balance and understand what’s really going on inside my mind. I can’t seem to find control over my dreams or my reality. Thinking, believing, doing, saying: there is no control. I don’t know if I have control over anything. If I did have control it would be different. People tell me to “not do this” and “not do that” and “think before you act.” But I can’t.
You ask me who I am, I say “ I don’t know”, because I really don’t. Maybe it’s a mental disorder, maybe it’s an emotional disorder, or maybe I’m not me. Crazy thing to think about. Not knowing who you are. I can dream about something and believe it really happened or that I really did it. Also something can be real and I won’t remember it, I won’t believe it. I want my mind to be able to comprehend what’s real and what’s fake. Am I crazy? Doubtful. I just don’t know the difference between dreams and reality. Not knowing or just not caring to see the difference. If you can figure out what’s a dream and what’s reality, let me know.
Anyway, See Ya Later,
Dillydallydallin
dillydallydallin 